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Kupcho
2nd October 2012, 12:34 AM
How to not be a noob, for dummies (NOOBS)

So you're here wondering: "How can I possibly not be a noob?!". Well i'm going to show you many different ways you can stop yourself from being a complete noob.

Contents:
1. Marketing
2. Public Interacting
3. Contacting admins

Key:
RED = BAD
GREEN = GOOD
Yellow = Acceptable



1. Marketing

So when you are a noob, you probably are a level one trying to get rich and level up. So usually, you go around trying to sell stuff as fast as possibly without roleplaying. So this is how a usual noob would be like:

- Noob appears at ganton gym outside.
Noob_Dummy: "Selling crack and pot cheap plz buy."
(And then they'd spam it by pressing "T" then down key)
(It'd look like this on your ingame screen.):
Noob_Dummy: "Selling crack and pot cheap plz buy."
Noob_Dummy: "Selling crack and pot cheap plz buy."
Noob_Dummy: "Selling crack and pot cheap plz buy."
Noob_Dummy: "Selling crack and pot cheap plz buy."

Correct way:
You usually look at people that would look like they are stoners, and approach them and talk in /l (low). You'd be like, "Interested in buying crackers and salsa?" Which obviously means crack, but not salsa.

Next, some noobs who have some profit to make /ad -s usually make it like this:
Advertisement: I sell lots crack and pot plz buy i poor k? ;Contact (9348530498234254)

^You'd get a warrant for that and then you'd probably get muted from ADs or probably get fined for NONRP advertisement.

Correct:
Advertisement: I'm selling some crackers and salsa for a fiesta!!; Contact (832578327589245)

Acceptable:
Advertisement: Selling crackers and potatoes; Contact (jkjfsdjfshgf)

The reason why ^ is hardly acceptable is because everyone knows what "Crackers and Potatoes" are. And especially if you do this:
Advertisement: Selling CRACKers and POTatoes; Contact (i3984idsa)
^Yeah you probably spasmed on the shift key? Cool story bro.


Public Speaking/Interacting

So when you want to make a rich friend... The average noobs are like this:
Le Wild Noob SMS' a high level person that thinks the person is rich. (MG)

Correct:
Le Wild Noob sees a infernus.
Noob: "Nice car there sir!"
Rich guy: "Thanks, hop in and i'd take you in for a ride."
Etc
Etc
Profit$$$


Next, you usually see people:
Noob: "k m8 lets go gangbang them nbs fkers"

Correct:
Noob: "Hey man that guy jumped one of our men, he looks exactly like that guy."


Contacting/Reporting for Admins

Seriously? You're reading this? Take a damn screenshot next time and post a FC. Not just spam:
/report aff DMer noob i have no ss but he hack and he dm rk cs affff
/report aff DMer noob i have no ss but he hack and he dm rk cs affff
/report aff DMer noob i have no ss but he hack and he dm rk cs affff




__
Thanks for reading, hopefully you are a pro now.

Justin Fakie
2nd October 2012, 01:28 AM
Pretty funny but also true. I guess it will help people in a simple way that doesn't offend anyone (I hope).

Nick
2nd October 2012, 03:53 AM
I sell gun pls buy im pur I ned moeny 4 infrenus

t

Jack
2nd October 2012, 04:27 AM
Now Blaire knows what to do she is such a huge noob

McRoyal
2nd October 2012, 05:54 AM
The Truth...
And the truths allways win.

Bud. great Guide, hopefully someone see it, newbies more like hanging around at Gym and shout /s i want family, /invite me or such things, the newbies dont want to be real "players" they want to stay newbies for the benfits.

Frank Malcom
2nd October 2012, 06:07 AM
*Deleted*
Sorry for posting twice, Internet problems.

Frank Malcom
2nd October 2012, 06:08 AM
Good Job , lmao, True that.
It's pretty sarcastic and funny but yeah, that's what happens.

Nice guide in my opinion.

Hyder
2nd October 2012, 06:37 AM
Spicy truth, good job mate.
Hope you'll continue it.

Kash
2nd October 2012, 07:52 AM
Haha, nice... and really it specifies the truth.

Yama™
2nd October 2012, 09:07 AM
sell vest

Kupcho
2nd October 2012, 09:13 AM
I'll update it when I have time, i'll even add examples of IG noobs shouting "Need gang /invite 35 please!!!"

Bert
2nd October 2012, 09:18 AM
Cool but 90 % of the noob dont know how to open forum and see this thread.

Kupcho
2nd October 2012, 06:34 PM
Cool but 90 % of the noob dont know how to open forum and see this thread.

So motherf*cking true!!

Luke Shiels
2nd October 2012, 08:03 PM
buy vest

DOOM
2nd October 2012, 09:02 PM
I like this. Keep it coming.

Hopsin
2nd October 2012, 09:20 PM
hello let me /sellvest you 247 even though its obvious you don't want it

Alvaro Armarti
2nd October 2012, 10:51 PM
Useless Thread..

Kupcho
3rd October 2012, 12:24 AM
Useless Thread..

Maybe you're a pro already?

Ethan
3rd October 2012, 03:29 AM
Yeah he is :P, but nice guide men.

Hallar Maraz
3rd October 2012, 03:57 AM
cool shit.
buymats

Nick
3rd October 2012, 04:22 AM
Now Blaire knows what to do she is such a huge noob

omg wtf y u adres me wit dat naem? i will buy spas an i want kill u

t

Jack
3rd October 2012, 05:36 AM
omg wtf y u adres me wit dat naem? i will buy spas an i want kill u

t

Paul Asus ; hi newbiez i r gona bay ur shatguns

Random newbie : Okay sir, here is a shotgun

Nick
3rd October 2012, 07:38 AM
Paul Asus ; hi newbiez i r gona bay ur shatguns

Random newbie : Okay sir, here is a shotgun

how do u kno?

t

Jack
3rd October 2012, 09:07 AM
how do u kno?

t

I just guess on your behavior ingame and on forums...
You are an forever-newbie type.

Jordi McHarley
3rd October 2012, 09:37 AM
I just guess on your behavior ingame and on forums...
You are an forever-newbie type.

He's a wannabe troll, but fails.

Ryan Crowley
3rd October 2012, 09:51 AM
Stupid. You tell people to break the server rules inside this thread.

If you have read the rules, you would know that you're not allowed to make illegal advertisements (including code words).

To make an advertisement, realistically you have to go through an advertising agency, therefore you can't sell illegal things via /ad. It's not difficult.